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Road Hogs: Chronicles of Redemption
Chapter 6: The Ghostly Gunrunners
Adventure 6: The Winston Haunting
The Road Hogs had secured five good deeds, but seven more loomed on the horizon before Morwen's spell would fully shatter. Leaving the bright city lights of Iron City behind, they navigated their choppers through a dreary valley into a town shrouded in permanent gloom. The adventure generator tables laid out a chilling new challenge:
| Element | Result | Description |
|---|---|---|
| Town Type | Old and run-down | Grave Creek, a neglected settlement near an ancient burial site. |
| Noteworthy Feature | An undead problem | The barrier between the living and the dead is dangerously thin here. |
| The Scenario | Recover stolen goods | Reclaiming a stash of stolen corporate tech taken by grave robbers. |
| The Location | Winston Funeral Home | A seedy brick mortuary with an eccentric owner. |
| The Objective | Business Rivals | A stolen corporate microprocessor is being hidden inside the morgue. |
| The Complication | Rotten Weather | An amateur ritual brings a rainstorm that awakens vegetarian zombies. |
Rain began to pelt the pavement in heavy sheets as the group pulled up outside the Winston Funeral Home. The neon sign over the door hummed weakly. Out front, an eccentric Scottish woman named Fiona Winston was wildly waving a silver shovel at the ground.
Fiona: Och, praise the road! You lads look like you ken how to handle a crisis! A bunch of corporate thieves used my basement morgue to hide a stolen prototype microprocessor, but an amateur hedge-wizard down the lane just botched a ritual to stop the rain. Now the storm water is blooming with necromantic magic!
Perry: Magic rain? That sounds like a terrible forecast for our leather jackets, lass. What exactly is it doing?
Fiona: It is waking the dead in the backyard garden! But they are not normal zombies—they are ravenous vegetarian ghouls! They are currently tearing up my prize-winning pumpkin patch and trying to break into the basement to eat my organic winter squash supply! If they get inside, they will ruin the stolen tech stash too!
Buster: Vegetarian zombies. Well, I suppose that means we are the ones who look like a snack to them, being half-pig and all.
Mac: Not if we lock down the back hatch first. Let me examine the hydraulic lifts on the cellar doors to seal them tight before the horde arrives.
🎲 Challenge: Hotwiring the funeral home's broken hydraulic cellar hatch to seal it
GM Designations: Agile Challenge | Difficulty: 5
Player Dice Pool: Mac works under the pouring rain. He rolls 3 dice (Matches Agile Trait). He embraces his Impulsive quirk, stripping the wires with his bare teeth in a hurry, which jacks up the difficulty to 6!
Dice Result: [6, 3, 1]
Outcome: Success! The 6 matches the maximum difficulty. The steel doors slam shut with a loud click, and Mac recovers 1 Resolve Token!
Mac: *Ptooey!* Tastes like copper and old grease, but that steel hatch is locked down tight! No zombie is getting into Fiona's squash cellar tonight!
Just then, a loud squelching sound echoed from the garden. A dozen muddy figures erupted from the soil, their eyes glowing green, groaning for fiber. Instead of coming for the bikers, they began tearing through the fence line, aggressively devouring Fiona's prize cabbages and marching toward the side windows of the main showroom where the corporate thieves were hiding.
Perry: Looks like the thieves inside are about to be overwhelmed by a very angry salad bar. Let us go secure the tech before the ghouls smash the place to pieces.
Brawl in the Embalming Room
The Road Hogs kicked open the side door, entering the sterile embalming room. Three corporate thieves in wet raincoats were frantically trying to unscrew a wall vent to retrieve the microprocessor case while the vegetarian ghouls smashed against the frosted glass windows outside.
Lead Thief: Smash the windows! Don't let those plant-eating monsters inside! Wait, who invited the biker pigs?!
Brawny: The department of sanitation, boys! And you are way past your expiration date!
⚔️ Combat Challenge: Defeat the corporate thieves and hold off the garden ghouls
GM Designations: Brawny/Agile Battle | Effort Tokens Required: 6
Round 1: Buster uses a gurney as a weapon!
Dice Pool: 3 dice (Brawny). Difficulty: 5.
Dice Result: [5, 6, 4] — Exceptional Success!
Outcome: 2 successes remove 2 Effort Tokens. Buster launches a steel gurney down the hall, pinning two thieves against the wall!
Round 1: Perry uses his wits to redirect the zombies' attention!
Dice Pool: 3 dice (Crafty). Difficulty: 5.
Dice Result: [2, 3, 5] — Success!
Outcome: 1 success removes 1 Effort Token. (Remaining Effort: 3).
Round 1: Mac snatches the microprocessor from the vent!
Dice Pool: 3 dice (Agile). Difficulty: 5.
Dice Result: [4, 1, 3] — Failure.
Action: Mac uses his Ace Driver reflexes to leap across the room, spending 1 Karma Token to drop the difficulty to 4. The 4 now counts as a success!
Outcome: 1 success removes 1 Effort Token. (Remaining Effort: 2).
Buster grabbed a heavy steel embalming gurney, gave it a massive shove, and sent it roaring down the linoleum hallway. It struck two corporate thieves square in the midsection, pinning them harmlessly but firmly against the far wall. Stand down, fellas! Buster rumbled, snorting a cloud of dust.
The glass shattered as three vegetarian zombies tumbled through the window, groaning loudly for greens. Perry instantly grabbed a large decorative vase filled with plastic ferns and tossed it into the hallway behind the remaining thieves.
Perry: Look, boys! An all-you-can-eat salad bar right over there! Go get your vitamins!
The ghouls immediately ignored the bikers and swarmed the thieves, biting their raincoats and wrestling them for the fake plants, completely distracting the opposition. Mac took advantage of the madness, diving across the table to tear the metal vent cover free and snatching the glowing microprocessor case out of the wall.
⚔️ Combat Challenge: Wrapping up the Robbery (2 Effort Remaining)
Round 2: Buster clears the room!
Dice Pool: 3 dice (Brawny). Difficulty: 5.
Dice Result: [5, 5, 2] — Exceptional Success!
Outcome: 2 successes remove the final Effort Tokens. The thieves are secured and the ghouls are guided back outside!
Buster used a large wooden broom to safely herd the vegetarian ghouls back out through the broken window, where Fiona was waiting with bags of old celery to lure them back into their graves. Mac used heavy zip-ties to secure the corporate thieves to the plumbing fixtures, ensuring they would not be going anywhere anytime soon.
Lead Thief: This is a nightmare! Defeated by a bunch of pigs and some aggressive compost!
Six Down, Seven to Go
As the rain finally began to clear, the amateur hedge-wizard arrived with a counter-spell, causing the vegetarian zombies to dissolve harmlessly back into rich topsoil. Fiona Winston held the microprocessor case, her Scottish accent beaming with gratitude.
Fiona: You lads are absolute treasures! You saved my winter squash, protected my home, and caught these corporate scoundrels. The tech company will pay handsomely for this return, and I am donating half to the highway charity in your name!
Perry: Much appreciated, Fiona. Just keep an eye on that pumpkin patch.
As they stepped back out to their bikes, another wave of warm magic surged through them. Buster looked at his thick neck in the chopper's mirror. The bristly pig hair had receded down to his collarbone, and his neck was completely human again. Slowly but surely, their bodies were returning to normal, even if their faces remained uncomfortably wild.
Buster: Well, look at that. Six good deeds down. We are chip-chip-chipping away at Morwen's little joke.
Mac: Six down means seven to go before we can stop hiding our mugs under these bandanas. Let us burn some rubber, boys.
The three choppers fired up, their engines breaking the quiet of Grave Creek as the Road Hogs tore back out onto the open road, hunting for their seventh victory...
The ride never stops! Road Hogs brings fast, cinematic roleplaying to life using the elegant, rules-light Tricube Tales system.
Grab your gear and create your own legends on the blacktop in this fantastic universe crafted by Richard Woolcock.
👉 You can find it here: DriveThruRPG - Road Hogs
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